Dear Black Man, Get In Community

I honestly have no idea where I would be without my bros. Though I now have productive and rewarding brotherhoods and connections with other Black men, it hasn’t always been that way. I’ve also been the guy that retreats or isolates myself when I was having personal problems or felt like no one could understand me. I’m not the only one who shares this perspective.

There are many of us who operate this way. But why is that? Maybe some of us don’t know what it feels like to have good relationships. Maybe some of us have experienced inconsistent relationships throughout our lives. Maybe we’re occupied with serving our own families, constantly working and providing. Maybe the upkeep of relationships isn’t easy or we feel like we simply don’t have the time. While all of these are valid feelings, I’ve learned that having a community to lean on is extremely beneficial.

I first realized that I needed to spend more time and be more consistent in my relationships with other Black men by watching my wife navigate her relationships with her close circle of friends. I poked fun at her at times, but I admired their consistency and desire to update one another about their wins, losses, and periods of confusion. They even communicate about the minor day to day things. I noticed one thing while observing this over time. They simply make the time to communicate and show up for each other. That in itself is a form of empowerment and strengthens their bond.

My wife and I have been together for a decade. I’ve watched/helped her grow and evolve, but her sisterhood has stood the test of time and set an example for me to do the same with the men in my life. Throughout these ten years together, her group chat has honestly set the tone for me reevaluating my inner circle and creating openness to add to it if necessary. It’s been rewarding to say the least.

Building a strong, supportive community for Black men is proven to foster personal growth, solidarity, and collective empowerment. Creating spaces where Black men can connect, share experiences, and uplift one another is more than necessary for healing and self-empowerment.

This community can take many forms—from mentorship programs and online support networks to social events and local gatherings. Each offers opportunities for connection, learning, and mutual support. By coming together, Black men can combat isolation, share resources, and build lasting relationships that inspire strength, purpose, and growth both individually and as a collective.

Life can be demanding and overwhelming at times but the community I’ve built (and continue to build) has made a world of difference. I have a core group of brothers but I also have brothers at church and Men’s Safe Space support groups that I host in the city. They all keep me accountable and help me to operate at my fullest potential.

Don’t get me wrong — I still enjoy my solo time to recharge, focus on my fitness, and to create, but my connections with other Black men has inspired me in many ways. We deserve to be in connection and collaboration. We’re not meant to navigate this world alone. The truth is that we need one another.